Tuesday fashion watch

Howdy GOGers

Today's rant is inspired by my recent trip to Switzerland.  No, I won't be spouting on the absolute joy that is air travel (see previous post) - but rather on the state of men's fashion.

Now I'm not putting myself forward as the next Gok, or Jason Gardiner (actually, WTF does Jason Gardiner know about fashion?  He's a dancer for fuck's sake.  And wears flat caps.  And puffy neck ties.).  But my passage through Gatwick North last week made me realise that most young men have morphed into a cross between Justin Bieber and One Direction.

And when I say young men, I don't mean your arty students or fledgling gays - no, I'm talking about your geeza blokes off to Faliraki with their perma-tanned bird.  Whilst I applaud the 21st century male for suddenly taking an interest in what he is wearing, as a gayer this is REALLY confusing.  Fifteen years ago, spotting a well dressed bloke with good skin, tattoos and a killer haircut meant that you were on to a pretty safe bet for potential bum fun.  Not any more.  Gatwick was literally crawling with deep V-neck T-shirts and espadrilles with no socks (more on that later), but the blokes would probably glass you in the face just for looking.

You can't blame it all on One Direction - Topman and ASOS have a lot to answer for, and as I've said men taking care of their appearance is no bad thing, but some of the fashions are truly shocking.  Perhaps it's a sign of old age (comment on my age, I fucking dare you), but below are a selection of this season's crimes:



V neck t-shirts
I'm not talking about all V neck t-shirts (because that would just be a bit silly).  No, the V neck t-shirt where the V is practically down to the crotch.  Makes you look like a wannabe Chippendale.



Drop crotch jogging bottoms
OH
MY
FUCKING
GOD

Really - who the FUCK thought this one up?  Is someone in fashion land having a joke?  How can looking as if you have a colostomy bag be remotely attractive?

Espadrilles with no socks
Oh this is a goody.  Espadrilles in general, pretty hideous the first time round.  Espadrilles with no socks and turned up trousers?  Jesus wept.  Think about it.  Men's bare feet.  Straw shoes.

And boat shoes are no better so don't even try that one.

What is most hilarious is that ASOS decided to use a model for this shot that is CLEARLY old enough to know better.  There's not growing old too early, and there's just fucking wrong.  You decide.



T-shirts with frilly bits and stuff

Really?  The T-shirt is a pretty well designed garment that doesn't actually need a redesign.  Bu that doesn't stop the fashionistas from deciding it would be good to 'add a twist'.  Where adding a twist means adding a bit of flouncy fabric to the neck, or even better making the whole shirt look like a bathroom blind.  Awesome.

Call me an old git (I dare you), but I've hardly got to the stage of  shopping at Fat Face and thinking I'm cool - but really people, even as a lifelong member of the gayers, some of this trash makes me weep....